After Christmas Doledrums

Christmas is over; all that's left is taking down all the Christmas stuff. That will take a few days. Heck, I still have my winter clothes in boxes - I need to switch out wardrobes this week-end for sure.

I am taking George to KC tomorrow and we're hanging out with Charlie. I have their gifts I need to take, too. Nothing fabulous but some fun things I hope. I missed not seeing any of my family over the holidays. Maybe next year some of us can go to John's for Christmas. Watch his kids open gifts.

I have to write out my New Year resolutions. They will pretty much be the same as last year: lose weight, socialize more, save money, pay down credit card debt, read a book a month, spend more quality time with Shawn. Nothing much ever changes in my life, not even my resolutions. I tell you, I'm so deep in this midlife crisis I don't know if I'll ever get out of it.

The Big Chill

I thought Shawn had adjusted the thermostat down; it was reading 62. So I adjusted it to 66. Two hours later it was adjusted back to 62! Cujo was burying herself under the blankets in her sleeping basket. I don't know what's going on; we either have a ghost messing with the temperature or the thermostat/furnace is going bonkers. I don't like either prospect. So we have someone coming out tomorrow to figure if we need an adjustment or an exorcism.

And we're suppose to be getting our next round of bad weather tomorrow - just in time for my infusion. I might have to cancel if the freezing rain starts by 10:00. I'm not driving to Overland Park on ice. Have I mentioned I hate winter?

I got a letter from Susanna but I'm not sure what the purpose was. She just reiterates how much she blames me for calling SRS in September and she can't see past that. Then the last paragraph says she's sending the letter to see what the outcome will be. I don't know what she wants from me... and I guess she's getting nothing. She and her brilliant husband are too hard for me - I am sick of walking on eggshells around them for fear of saying something that they won't like and will retaliate by not letting me hang with their daughters. I miss the girls but to be honest, my life has been easier not having to deal with the drama that is my sister. I'll have to think on this for awhile.

I'm off to bed; let's hope the furnace holds on (it's suppose to get down to 15 or something so no furnace means misery and frozen pipes for sure!)

Table for Two

George called asking if I wanted to take him out and feed him. I did. I don't mind doing it right now but that game could get old pretty quick. He says he's looking for a job and I have to believe him, I know this is the worst possible time to be unemployed, but... Anyway, we went to Culvers for a fairly cheap meal (if $20 is cheap).

I had Tom's four kids over for the night last week-end. They were suppose to be here at 4:00 so we could catch the town's Christmas parade and fireworks - they showed up at 6:00, sat in front of the TV and didn't blink until I sent them to bed. They were back up and in front of the TV before I got up in the morning. I fed them and took them home. Not really what I was hoping for when I invited them over. They have an obsession with TV; that's all they want to do. Next time I will pick them up and take them someplace then take them home. Can't watch TV when there isn't one!

Tomorrow I head to Lee's Summit for a cookie exchange. It's going to take me an hour to get there and an hour to get home. All for cookies. But the lady having the party is a well-liked coworker of mine and she's excited about having the gathering. And I'm sure I will enjoy it once I get the drive over with! I'll have to remember to Map Quest directions before I head out!

This is the 12th and we've had exactly one Christmas card. I sent mine out two weeks ago. People just don't send cards like they used to. I only sent 16 myself. I've stopped sending cards to people who only send them to me when they get mine and it's the only time I hear from them all year. In a few more years I won't get a card at all!

Sick Cats

Two out of four cats are sick - one, Mysterious, is very sick. He and Cujo are both feeling icky. Cujo is kind of up and moving, drinking water at least. Myster has gone from under the bed to my lap, back under the bed and is now in Shawn's hamper. He hasn't eaten, had anything to drink or used the litter box all day. If he is still like this tomorrow, it's off to the vet. $200 I"m sure, but I will definitely pay it if they can make him feel better (and ensure it's nothing more than a tummy ache or a cold or something). I hate when my babies get sick; they look so unhappy and I can't really help them too much. Poor babies. I highly suspect it's from the Purina Cat Chow I have for Tucker and the outside friends. Tucker will ONLY eat Purina and the other cats prefer it, even though I know it makes Cujo sick and I suspect it makes Myster sick. Tiger Lily seems to be able to eat anything and be OK. I try to keep the 'bad' food away from Cujo but I'm not very successful, and I haven't kept it from Myster at all. I have to do better for them.

I bought some of Shawn's Christmas gifts. Hopefully they won't just end up in the closet or a drawer somewhere, unused, unwanted and forgotten. I'm not very good at getting him things. When all he does is watch TV and play poker with his friends, there's not a whole lot he needs or uses. I've tried to get him things to get him interested in a hobby or activity but it's never really worked. And he won't make a list out for me; he always just says, 'don't get me anything'. And that would make me feel useless. He knows I have to get him SOMETHING. He's a hard one to shop for.

Time to Give Thanks

Made it through Thanksgiving. Charlie backed out on plans to hit the casino and the plaza lighting ceremony so I ended up at the Weissenbachs. First time ever. And, they served HAM! I was amazed. It was a good thing I had a turkey defrosting at home; I made my turkey and stuffing for dinner Friday. Then we were back over there this evening for a German Fest; brats as far as the eye could see. Shawn ate three! And he wonders why he has weight issues. (I ate one, and wonder why I have weight issues!!) Now it's on to Christmas. I have started a to-do list, which is sad because I was planning on making this holiday season lowkey. I can't even do lowkey right - frustrating.

I need to start working on a New Year Resolution list. I tend to write about a dozen and keep one only this year being as horrid as it's been I haven't even kept one. I'll have the sames ones next year, I'm sure (lose weight, get in shape, pay off bills, read a book a month, spend time with friends.) I'm nothing if not predictable!

Feed the Poor

George came by this afternoon to get better cellphone reception and to use my computer to send out some online apps. He also wanted to be fed. He has gone through the cash we gave him from the estate, he has no job and, thus, no food to eat. So I took him to Applebee's and fed him. I don't mind doing that every now and again but I don't want it to become a habit. I just got rid of one expensive sibling; I don't need to replace her.

I had my infusion this morning - the office is quite busier in the mornings! People were coming and going; it was all very interesting. And CNN was on the TV, not Food Network. It was like getting my infusion at a different office! Now I'm good for another four weeks - that time flies, too.

Wednesday I need to get Shawn's Christmas gifts before I spend all my money! Hopefully it won't be too busy at 1:00. I am NOT doing the Thanksgiving Day Week-End Sales thing! If I don't get the stuff Wednesday I will get it later next week. Then I'll be done with shopping and will just need to get things wrapped, in the mail and under the tree. What I would give to be able to just skip this holiday season all together!

Happy Birthday, Mom

Today Mom would have been 74. I can't imagine her being that old. I managed to get my 10-hour work day done by 4:00, got to the store for flowers and took them to the cemetery. I left flowers for the Hunt grandparents, flowers for the Santa grandparents and flowers for MY parents. It was the first time I had been there since Dad passed; it was surreal to see a death date for him on the tombstone. Green grass is just starting to cover the dirt. Needless to say, I cried all the way home. I really am getting tired of crying all the time!

I also bought some little things to send Mykenzie and Lindsey with their Christmas ornaments. It's a challenge to find non-chocolate Christmas candies! I wonder how long it takes to ship something to Greece. I will probably be getting the package in the mail in the next week or so. I can't believe Thanksgiving is next week; I have no holiday spirit at all. I would love to just kind of skip the holidays this year. But if I did that, I might never find it again.

I need a German side dish recipe. The in-laws are hosting a German Fest the Saturday after Thanksgiving. All the Germans seem to eat is brats, sauerkraut. and potatoes. Did I mention I located my sole German ancestor? She was on Dad's mother's side, the Reick side. I knew I had a drop in me somewhere! Maybe that one drop of German will help me find a unique recipe!

Dream a Little Dream

I had a dream last night; I was at home and Mom and Dad were heading out to dinner. As Mom walked out the door, I commented to her how good she was looking on her feet. Dad followed, hat in hand. Mom stopped, turned around, stepped back into the house and asked that I get a trash bag and a bag of M&Ms. I went to the kitchen, got the items and carried them to the door - only to find Mom and Dad had vanished. I said out loud, 'where did they go?' and someone said, 'they're gone' and I knew that they were. I was so despondent that I called my boyfriend, though I had never called him before. I thought that boyfriend was the old Marine guy but the voice that answered the phone said, 'Somebody and Weissenbach'. I hung up, realizing that the 'boyfriend' I was trying to call was Shawn, not the Marine, and the number he gave me was a work number as though he didn't want to get too personal with me. I was very upset and I woke up upset and have been upset all day. I don't quite get the Shawn detail but I do understand Mom and Dad were once again trying to tell me they are happy. I just miss them so much. SO MUCH.

Extended Invitation

I sent Susanna an email to see if the girls can go to the Christmas Lights Parade in a few weeks. I suggested she check with her dear husband to ensure they can get themselves down there as I'm sure she won't want to ride with me but the girls must be chaperoned now. I don't think they will allow the girls to go; I'm not expecting it. I found out they wore John down and he ended up paying their electric bill. I'm glad for the girls as they don't deserve to live in the dark but I'm angry that those idiots once again used someone else's money to cover their responsibilities. I wouldn't mind if Susanna and Gregg disappeared from my life forever; though I would miss the girls terribly. Having them out of my day-to-day has helped with my stress levels. And maybe being out of their day-to-day has helped with their stress levels, too. Maybe we aren't suppose to remain a family. I certainly don't miss them.

Spared Again

I've been spared again. I sat in stunned silence as one, two, three, four, five, SIX team members were handed their walking papers today. The company said they were laying off 17% of their work force but my team bled 32%. I sat with headphones on ready for the call from my manager telling me I had been given a pink slip. Fortunately it didn't come. The names on the list of people losing their jobs shocked me; from the mail lady to vice presidents - no one was safe this time around. This is the fifth time I've gone through layoffs; it is killing me. And it isn't over - layoffs will continue all week. I think they are going team-by-team; if so, my team has already been slaughtered. Totally shocked.