Week-End Plans Blown to Pot

For weeks I had been planning a night getaway with Shawn to Chateau Avalon, even re-booking when snow hit. We stayed in the Castaway Isle room which was like sleeping in a tree house with a bubbling pond down below - very cool. Treated him to dinner at Cheeseburger in Paradise (in keeping with the theme) and covered the cost of the room. He paid for nothing, we reconnected (in a much needed way!) and headed home Sunday morning happy. We then went to Jayden's birthday party - I even drove a ridiculous truck out there so he could nap on the way. And I had no issues with him heading out to poker that evening.

Then he blew it. He came home drunk.... again. And he decided it would be fun to throw Mo Sockie on top of a very sick Cujo Kitten. Cujo ended up throwing up and has been throwing up ever since. And when I yelled at him to leave her alone, she was sick, his drunken response was, 'good, maybe she'll die.' All the planning, the romance, the cost of the week-end gone in one fell swoop.

I've come to a decision I will share with him some time this week. If his drinking is as bad in ten years, I am leaving the marriage. He has ten years to get some help - I have ten years to get prepared to be on my own. I lived with alcoholics during my childhood, I live with an alcoholic during my working years - by God if I will live with an alcoholic during my end years. I'll have enough issues and won't need to have to continue to deal with this one. Ten years and I will divorce him. I deserve at least a part of my life alcoholic-free.

Another Sick One

Just when I get one cat well again, another one gets hit with something. I nursed Cujo through an eye infection, then nursed Mo through a tummy ache and now I have one hurt Cujo. She is limping so badly on her hind right leg that I finally took her in to the vet after watching her limp around for three days. The doctor couldn't find anything broken (thank goodness) but agreed Cujo was in pain. Usually cats will hide their pain as a defensive mechanism and Cujo hurt so much she couldn't hide it. She cried and growled and hissed as the doctor moved her injured leg around. It was determined it is her hip but x-rays show no break. Somehow she just managed to sprain it real severely. She got a shot for the pain and I have pain drops to sneak to her if she needs them and she is to take it easy for a few days. Which means the boys have to stop chasing her (I wonder if Mo's chasing is what hurt her to start with.) My poor baby girl.

I have Susanna's girls and Tom and family coming over Saturday for an Egg Hunt/Basket Search. I have the baskets and eggs ready to go but still need to come up with clues for the Search. Five clues for each kid, five kids... that's a lot of clues. Guess I'll be doing that tomorrow. I also have to clean house - it smells to high heaven of cat spray (thanks, Mo!) Fifi is coming over Friday to help me shampoo the carpets.

It never ends.

March Madness

This is turning into a crazy month. The kittens turn One on Thursday- I can remember the day they were born and how unhappy Tiger Lily was but how incredible her instincts to care for them were. I miss my Tiger Lily and hope she's ruling her new roost.

I think I might have seen Mysterious Charmin. A cat resembling what he would look like has been hanging around but runs when it sees me. So I can't be sure. Today the cat walked right under the front windows not knowing I was on the other side and I got a good look at it. Although the head shape is different than I would expect, there was a patch of under fur right about where Myster had his. I know that doesn't mean too much, but... What do I do if I determine it IS Mysterious? Five cats is too many so which one would I sacrifice??

I had a pap smear re-do. The doctor said not to worry too much about it but I can't help worrying. The last test found endrometri cells when it shouldn't have, which means I don't know what! I have about three weeks to wait for the results. Three long weeks. And the doctor commented that my cervix is practically closed up - which could explain why my periods are so far in between. He said the flow could just not be able to get out - no idea what happens to it.

I've not been feeling well and sleeping a lot. Climbing stairs winds me, walking a block winds me. I'm scared I'm heading toward a heart attack in the next year. I have to stop this. I have to, and I don't know why I'm not. I don't have a death wish - really I don't.

And I have to put in three hours of OT between tomorrow and Saturday. I'll probably do all three on Saturday, making it the fourth or fifth week-end in a row I've worked.

And the cost of airline tickets to Greece have gone up. Can't catch a break.